Some may argue that conflict and confrontations are a life blood of many relationships. Be those work, family, friend or romantic relationships. I would beg to differ. We can all have constructive conversations, make ourselves heard without the need for a confrontation.
Too often people either inadvertently or deliberately pick fights and cause conflict. It might be a power play, a need to feel “respected” or just frustration showing through. Whatever the topic that needs to be discussed it degenerates into an unpleasant war of words.
It doesn’t need to be this way. It’s perfectly possible to discuss contentious issues (or any issues) without friction and fury.
How? It takes practice and awareness. Once you master it you’ll discover it’s an excellent way to be, so that very little in life will bring you friction. We all know when we’re going to start a difficult conversation, or when one starts to become tricky. The secret is not to go with the tension and “heat”, but to calmly and gently raise the points you need to. With room for the other side to have their say too.
Gently is the key. You need to allow for disagreement, expect it, then you can work with it. The other person needs to be heard, then you have a better chance of collaborating to reach a joint way forward. Stick to the key points that need to be covered, avoid “finger pointing” and you’ll be surprised how far you might get.